When I left home a few years ago to go on a journey away from my family, I didn't know how hard it would be to live abroad. No matter where you go, locals always use foreigners as scapegoats for their problems, and England isn't any different.

As a foreigner, you can never get it right with the locals, no matter how outstanding you might be. Some will blame you for their unemployment and financial difficulties, others will target you at work for not being one of them, and let's not forget how foreigners almost always commit all crimes.

Living abroad is a double-edged sword where you get to explore a different culture, learn a new language, and meet new people, while being perceived as the source of every problem in your host country. I don't have it as bad as some people, but it's one of the reasons I left my quiet life in the North of England to start over in London.

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I want to start by thanking you for reading my blog and I know most people don't like changes but I want to take my blog to the next level so I changed the webhost and gave it a makeover. Candid memoir is now hosted on Candid-Memoir.com

I couldn't transfer the current domain and had to get a new one, please click on the image or follow the link for bigger and better adventures.

Why am I feeling so emotional!

Nessa: It’s amazing how well things seem to work out for you

Alicia: That’s usually what happens when you make the right choices and have a bit of luck

Nessa: What is that supposed to mean?

Alicia: Nothing, I’m just saying things tend to work out for you when you make all the right decisions

Nessa: Oh, I guess I’m not doing as well as you because I’m stupid

Alicia: Decision-making has nothing to do with stupidity

Nessa: Back in high school, you used to follow me around like a pet, and now “Miss successful” thinks I’m not able to make a sound decision.

Alicia: *Eye roll

Nessa: Don’t roll your eyes at me. Who do you think you are?

Alicia: I’m Alicia, your only friend, and do you know why I’m the only friend you have?

           That’s because you’re self-centered and you think everything is about you.

Nessa: *Gasp

What do you think of this dialogue? Share your thoughts in the comments and feel free to give context or add to the dialogue.

"This is it, this is exactly how I want my dream home to look."

I thought to myself as a pulled a phone out of my pocket to take some photos.

I was on my way home from Marylebone when I stopped by IKEA Piccadilly Circus to buy a teapot. I attended a herbal tea blending workshop this summer and have been experimenting with different blends and aromas to make iced tea, hoping to find a unique taste I can commercialise.

So I needed a glass teapot to clearly see the process of mixing the ingredients. It may seem hard to believe, but I wasn’t looking for anything other than the teapot, even though I’m an impulse buyer.

It was my first time at IKEA Piccadilly Circus, and I had no idea where to find the kitchenware aisle, so I walked quite a lot. While turning a corner from the home office aisle, I came across my dream living.

A Simple, Elegant, And Cutesy Home Decor

I’ve been living in a shared house since moving to London, and it’s my first time sharing a house with strangers. It wasn’t easy, but I’m starting to get used to it. So I don’t have any plans of getting a house yet, I’m actually not sure whether I should get my own place in London or move out of the city.

It was also expensive to move to London, and the truth is, I can’t afford a new place right now. Yet, I stumble on my dream home decor while looking for a teapot in IKEA. The living room decor is made of a small pastel blue sofa with two baby pink cushions, a wooden coffee table, a bamboo chair, and a bamboo screen.

It was simple and elegant, as a minimalist, I couldn’t dream of a better decor. A couple of minutes later, I saw my dream kitchen, it was dark green and pale pink with 3 mismatched chairs and a dining table. It felt like the dining table was made up of different chairs gathered at a flea market, and I loved it.

"A house is made of bricks and beams, but a home is built with love and dreams"

Why Finally Find It When I’m Broke

I found the bedroom on my way to the kitchenware aisle. It was made up of a grey double bed with silky, burned orange bedding, two soft pillows, two hard pillows, and a small cushion. 

There was a grey footstool on the side, a built-in wardrobe, and a large Venetian mirror. Can you imagine how it would feel to come home to such an exquisite bedroom after work?! Once again, I pulled out my phone to take a photo while thinking that it was funny how life plays games with people sometimes.

I never found my dream home when I had a house and could afford it. But now that I’m starting to get used to my new life in this city, I have found everything I want in my home except for the bathroom. It may not be within my budget now, but it doesn’t mean I should give up.

When Does A Piece Of Furniture Become Vintage

Before moving to London, one of my hobbies was vintage collections. I always made time to visit charity shops and flea markets to find items to add to my collection, and it was pretty amazing.

So I have a preference for vintage decor over a trendy one, vintage furniture never goes out of style, and some even gain value over time. So I don’t mind waiting a few years until I can afford my dream home, and some of the furniture might become cheaper or vintage over the years.

I’m pretty sure one of these items will pop up at a flea market somewhere, even if they are discontinued, so I’m willing to play the long game to finally get my dream home…

This is one of those moments when you thought you had a great idea, but it turns out to be stupid.

A week ago, I wasn’t looking for anything in particular online when I came across a couple of items I liked and added them to my basket. Since my order didn’t reach the free delivery threshold, a fee would have been applied.

I chose click and collect, which is a free delivery option to your nearest store. There’s just something about paying for delivery that puts me off every time I try to check out a basket.

I understand why a delivery fee would apply here since my purchase was less than £50, but it doesn’t mean I was willing to pay for it. I thought it would be better for me to pick up the parcel from the store.

Read full article here and you can watch the video below

When people ask me why I moved to London, I usually say " I was feeling stuck and needed to start over". But the truth is my life felt empty after my daughters started living with their dad.

I was a working single mum until last year, when my daughters aged 11 and 14 went to live with their dad for the first time since we broke up. Life wasn't easy for me raising two children on my own in a foreign country and I was looking forward to the day the kids will leave home for university.

Starting Over In A New Country

I moved to North England with my daughters who were still young at the time after my relationship with their dad fell apart. I needed a reset and I thought making a life for myself and my daughters in a new country was just what I needed.

I can't say that I regret my decision to move abroad but the last few years were hard, I had to find a place to live, learn the language and find a job while looking after two children under 7 who were now living away from their dad.

I was so focused on doing the right thing for myself and my daughters, I didn't allow myself to be selfish and make mistakes. My life was just about work and parenting. I had no friends or family to rely on and my daughters were all I had.

When You Have No One To Rely On

Nothing mattered to me more than their happiness, I did my best to provide for them and be there when they needed me. But there's so much a single parent can do especially when you don't take the time to relax and live your own life.

After a few years of going above and beyond for my daughters, I finally burned out and my ex stepped in to take the kids so I could breathe. I was bitter at first because he waited until the oldest was in high school to offer his help but I really needed a break so I agreed.

They've been living with their dad since August last year. I was relieved and looking forward to finally living my life. I may be in my 40s but there's still so much I want to do and places I'd love to visit so I was glad to be a childless mum.

The House Became Too Quiet

After a month, loneliness kicked in. It was depressing for me to come back to an empty house after a long day at work. I spent my days off in bed even though I had plans to go out and have fun. I was on my own for the first time since becoming a mum and even spent Christmas alone.

"The greatest thing in the world is to know how to belong to oneself."

                                                                                                     Michel de Montaigne

I couldn't go on with my life living in a house filled with happy memories and bad moments spent with my daughters like nothing happened so I dropped everything and moved to London.

I'm still lonely here but it's a different type of loneliness…